Just for my documentation

This is just so I can remember when we did all the IVF stuff. Nothing exciting, just a list of dates . . .
The funny thing is that it seemed like I had to do injections for forever! Looking back, it is a relatively quick process.
Thursday, Feb. 4, 2010 Injection class to learn how to give the injections - points learned: pinch until it hurts, then inject; once you go to inject, don't stop!!!! Plan on going all the way in. Didn't follow this advice one time - horrible idea, the last little bit that you have to push the needle in is KILLER!!!!
Sunday, Feb. 7, 2010 Start lupron injections. This was one of my biggest fears (had a friend who was on lupron for endometriosis and felt like she was going through menopause), turned out to be the easiest part of this process :)
Friday, Feb. 19, 2010 Start of my "cycle" (So in actuality, the babies were 34 weeks, not 34.5 weeks gestation)
Monday, Feb. 22, 2010 Start 3 shots per day - Repronex (stinger), Follistim (cute little pen), continue lupron
Monday, March 1, 2010 Week of egg retrieval
Monday, March 8, 2010 Week of embryo transfer. U of U (Dr. C Matthew Peterson, our doctor) was doing a study to see if there was a higher "take home baby" rate transferring 1 embryo instead of 2. We actually got into the study (random), but we didn't qualify because we needed 2 embryos at B2 quality or higher (B1 is highest quality) and we only had 1 . . . So, based on all factors - bicornate uterus, previous miscarriage, quality of embryos, etc. It was recommended we put in 2 embryos - one B2 quality and one EB1 quality (EB is just below B). The only embryo we have left is EB1 quality, so we are going to try putting that one in, in a few years ;)
The rest of the dates are a bit hazy after that, so here is the run down without solid dates:
Pregnancy test - blood test at the U . . . When the nurse called me back with the results, she said, "You have probably already taken an at home test and already know that you are pregnant." What!?!? Are you kidding? Thus far (in this post) I have not let you in on the depression I had been going through since I started the injections in Feb. So, I interject to give the back story:
Miscarriage - August 2005 - devastating
Failed IVF - November 2009 - prepped myself for the worst, but definitely disappointing
Mom moves out of house, starts divorce process - November 2009 - expected, but hit me harder than I thought it would
Blow-up and melt-down of Scrapping Simply (Rex's online printing company)due to long-term issues with marketing director - December 2009 - Stressful beyond belief
Now comes February and Rex is ready to try IVF again . . . notice I said Rex - not me :) Due to non-debilitating depression (guessing from the previous months), I was not ready and did not want to start the process ever again! Rex was ready and "knew" that we were going to have to try 2 times. I wasn't willing to have a December baby (due to retail, Rex is absent from our family from Thanksgiving to Christmas) So we were going to have to start RIGHT NOW!
After ending up at a psychiatrist's (I absolutely loved her) office a few weeks in to the injections, I decided there was no way out and we went for it. The feelings lingered, though, and by the time the pregnancy test came, I truly wanted a "not pregnant" - that way I could deal with the let down now and not later . . . but it was not meant to be. So when she expected me to have already done a pregnancy test, I realized that I was putting off hearing the results.
Megan was actually working in the same building that we did the pregnancy test, so we went down to see her and wait for the news. After seeing my reaction to the "positive" news, a co-worker of hers offered this advice - advice that saved my life and sanity!
Why does she need to expect a baby from this? Why can't she just take it one day at a time? Celebrate today, because today you are pregnant! Today you have a little bean growing in your uterus. No expectation of anything past that. Little did she know that I would still be using that mantra late into the pregnancy. At our family reunion (5 months along), people were asking about names and the nursery and other baby prep things. I honestly hadn't thought that far in advance, I was still just thankful and celebrating that I was 5 months along. No plans for an actual baby (or two). This may be hard to understand, but it was the only way for me to make it through!
Side note - when we started planning IVF (August 2009), we asked Maleah if she wanted a baby brother or baby sister, repeatedly she would respond, "A baby brother and a baby sister - AT THE SAME TIME!" Knowing our doctor would only put in 1 embryo, I thought there was no way, but she must have know Javen and Hannah in heaven.
Next we had a viability scan to see how many viable embryos we had - we told the doctor we were looking for one - two or zero would be bad news. He said, "Well, I hate to disappoint, but you have 2" Twins! Excitement finally showed itself - my first thought was - two cribs, double stroller - have.to.go.buy.them.right.now . . . then mantra came into head and I quieted the excitement for sanity's sake. And started taking it just one day at a time.
Here is what I had recorded on my phone:
Week of march 15 - tired like going to start period & sore boobies
Positive prego test march 19 - HCG 504, march 21 - HCG 1017
March 24 - 1 wave of nausea - short; walked 1.5 miles treadmillMarch 25 - nausea, gag, mouth water in hot bathroom after shower; walked 1.5 miles treadmill
March 26 - woke up middle of night with mild anxiety attack, sudoku soothed and able to fall back to sleep
April 7 - brown spotting in morning, enough to need a light pad. No real cramping
May 3 - haven't really felt pregnant. A little bloated. Today when I pee though, I feel like I have a knot in my abdomen near my bladder.
May 15 - serious nausea around 10 AM, red spotting around 4:00, noticed when I went the bathroom. Feeling extra bloated.
May 16 - brown spotting, neither day had enough to warrant a pad
May 17 - lighter than light spotting, felt emotionally like going to start period - no motivation, blah, irritable with the feeling I need to exercise.
May 18 - 4:30am heavyish bleeding, feels like a clot is sitting in my vagina waiting to pop out. No cramping. I emotionally NEED an ultrasound :)On a happy note, tonight is the first time I have been able to feel my growing uterus :D it feels a little set to the left side of my body, it also feels like it comes up to about 2 inches below my belly button. Pregnancy is amazing! Rex noticed it first (I don't often play or even touch my belly button) but my belly button is feeling rather shallow. Even when I got down to my lowest size and weight with Jess, our trainer, I didn't notice much of a change. Huh!?!?!!
May 19 - Doppler came, heard heartbeat, still more brownish spotting
May 20 - woke up at 5:45, feeling like something going to slip out, just same brownish light spotting. Red after dinner, seemed to stop
May 21 - woke up at 3:30, red on underwear, turned toilet water red, put on a pad. Spotted through May 30
May 29 - changing from sitting to standing position feels like ripping my uterus in two - wondering if round ligament pain again
June 7 - I think I can feel baby b moving
June 10 - 16 weeks and "truly showing". Sneezing causes round ligament pain
June 28 - 18 weeks. Can feel them moving. It feels like flutters across or down one side of me. Sometimes soft little pokes (here's hoping those pokes stay fairly soft) like they are sticking out a limb or something. I can feel our little girl the most - she is most active. It is reassuring to feel them moving :)
July 8 - Rex and I both were able to feel baby from the outside - we think it was baby boy, but so cool. He bumps up near my ribs, it still feels like a soft poke.
July 22 - swollen ankles - mostly at the end of each day. Kept happening for at least 4 days.
Sept 6 - spotting - brown, fairly light. Walked to car after BYU football game day before
Sept 7 - starting to feel pregnancy face - darkness on cheek bones, puffy face . . .
Sept 9 - I can see them moving across my belly - some bumps, some rolls, some flittering - SO cool :) I could just watch them all day!
Sept 26 - 31 weeks, 2 days - I have felt crummy for the past week - started taking iron supplements, which has helped with feeling tired, but now constipation and gas are making my GI uncomfortable. Last night my stomach was very tight - especially below my belly button. I wonder if they are both head down, or just getting bigger. I should be measuring 40 weeks - full term - by this coming Thursday. October 20 seems really far away :) I want to keep them in as long as possible, but it is getting really crowded in here, really fast! I seem to feel better physically when I take it easy and lounge around all day, but emotionally it is really tough to do.
October 15 - woke up at 5:30 with pinching intestinal like cramping - figured it was some yucky gas, pain got more intense and started to feel more like menstrual cramping. At 7:00 started timing - 2-4 minutes apart. Started packing and headed to the hospital. Got to hospital around 8:30, contractions too painful to sit through. Needed to walk, back massage would have been helpful, most comfortable position at home was on all fours. Nurse checked me at 8:30 - dilated to a 6/6.5 Dr Nance was out of town, called on-call doc. Epidural started just before 9, Dr Skinner came running in (out if breath) just after 9. Checked me, only felt feet, fully dilated, rushed to operating room. Javen born at 9:59 AM, Hannah didn't want to come out, her placenta was coming out before her (if placenta detaches, no oxygen for baby), so they had to keep placenta back and force her down. They increased the uterine incision, to better get her. Hannah born 10:02 AM Javen was breathing fine on his own, Hannah had air pushed into her and she started breathing. They showed Javen to me in the OR, didn't get to see Hannah until I was sewn up.